As a confident guy, you should be fitting women into your schedule, not the other way around.
Don’t be easy to pin down. This places you in a category of men she isn’t used to dealing with, and it reverses the traditional rules of courtship: normally, women are the ones who play “hard to get” and make it difficult for men to schedule plans with them.
As a successful, confident, you are the one who is occupied with other things, and you see women on your terms.
In today’s dating world, this sets you apart as a true maverick.
Most guys will hang on the phone for as long as she was wants to talk, even if it means listening to her complain about her sex life with her ex-boyfriend for an hour. Whenever she’s free, these guys will put everything else aside to talk to her, or spend time with her.
Women grow bored with this type of man. If he’s always available, it’s a sign that he has nothing else going on his life, and that no other women are interested in him. Women are intrigued by a man who is a hot commodity, not a guy who is free any time she is available.
So instead of immediately accepting her offer the next time she invites you to hang out, create I.O.U.’s. (This is a kick-ass Mack Tactics technique that I fully explain in the “Ultimate Edition” book, available at Mack Tactics.)
When a girl calls this type of guy to say “me and my friends are going to the bar tonight, do you want to meet up later?”, he won’t commit right away. Even if he has no plans this evening, he’ll project the image of a busy guy.
He’ll say “I have some people I need to see (or some business I need to handle), but maybe later I can make an appearance.” (I love that phrase, “make an appearance.” It makes you sound like a celebrity who will be gracing them with your presence.)
Then, he may choose to not show up at all. He’ll tell her the next day “Sorry, something came up.” (He won’t offer an explanation.) This only increases his allure and the sense that he is a “commodity.” The next time they do hang out, she’s going to make an extra effort to entice him. She knows he is in demand, and she won’t want to let him slip through her fingers.
Again, you are turning the tables. Normally, on a date, it’s the guy who is eagerly trying to impress the woman and “score points” with her. When a woman is on a date with you, she is the one trying to score points and capitalize on a limited window of opportunity.
A very important note before we move on: when you do meet up with a girl—whether it’s for a date, or you’re meeting her and her friends at a club—I’m not suggesting that you should act arrogant or aloof, like you’ve got somewhere more important to be. When you are not with her and she wants to see you, you’ve got to play a little bit “hard to get.”
But when you are with her, you must be completely focused on her. You’re totally attentive and “in the moment.” This makes her even MORE eager to see you again, because you make her feel special. But it’s always going to be on your terms, on your schedule.
Also, women tend to be flaky and be late to appointments, but you should always be punctual.
Your time is precious, and if she makes a habit of showing up late to meet you, you’ve got to call her on it. Most guys will act like it’s no big deal when she shows up at the restaurant 20 minutes late: “Oh, don’t worry about, it’s fine…”
Instead, you should call her on it: “Wow, this is the second time you’ve been late to meet me. What’s up with that?”
Say it with a smile—you don’t want to sound pissed—but make sure she gets the message: you’re not cool with people showing up 20 minutes late to an appointment with you. And you’re not going the typical spineless-nice guy route and excusing her behavior.
After she babbles her apology and explains her lateness, switch gears and move onto a fun topic. Just make sure that seed is planted in her mind: your time is valuable, and must be respected. By showing up late, she tested you — and you passed with flying colors.
Be A Leader
The older men I’ve observed, who have tremendous success with younger women, understand how to be a leader. When he goes out for a meal, he knows what he likes to eat, and he has a list of favorite restaurants around town.
He knows which movies are playing, and the one he wants to see. He has his favorite clubs and bars, and when he shows up, a bartender or a waitress will always welcome him by name.
And when he arranges a date with a woman, he doesn’t ask her opinion on where they should go. His plan is mapped out. She gets to come along for the ride.
Weak Move: “So what do you feel like doing tonight?”
Strong Move: “I’ll pick you up at eight, we’re going to have some fun. Wear something sexy.”
(This is an excellent Tactic. Tell her what to wear. You don’t need to be specific; just say “wear something sexy.” She’ll be thinking about you, and winning your approval, for the entire two hours it takes her to select her outfit and get ready.)
Women respect, and follow, a man who leads. As a man, this is part of your masculine duty. It is expected of you. When men defer to women and don’t want to make decisions, women grow irritated with them because they’re being forced to play the masculine role in the relationship, and this is not natural.
Look at all the pathetic married guys who constantly give in to their wives’ demands, and let them run the show. Do their wives appreciate it? Hell no! It makes them henpeck their husbands even worse. Because women, contrary to how they might act, don’t want to be the “boss” all the time. They’re wishing their man would show a backbone and behave like an Alpha Male.
When it’s time to schedule a date, figure out in advance where you want to take her, so that you never appear unsure. Project an air of self-assuredness at all times. As long as you lead, and keep them interested in the “challenge,” women will follow…into your bedroom, and beyond.