More examples of tests,
Mention a cool spot in your area that most people aren’t aware of. It could be an out-of-the-way bar, a live music spot, a restaurant, a mountain you hiked…whatever. Ask her if she’s been there.
If she says “yes,” then pull her in. If she says “no,” then push her away:
“Wow, Lisa, you’ve never even tried sushi? I figured you’d be an adventurous type of girl who’s tried every type of cuisine…but it’s good that we met, because I know every good Japanese restaurant in this city.”
Or, you could say:
“My friend Michelle just got back from a trip to India. She’s such a fascinating person, I find that people who do a lot of traveling have a deeper perspective on things. So tell me about the most amazing place you’ve ever been to…”
This prompts her to reveal whether she’s done much traveling. if it turns out she has, then continue to push and pull: “That’s good to know you’re so well-traveled. I wasn’t sure about you at first, Maria, but I guess there’s more to you than meets the eye.” (That was actually a pull-push-pull, if you think about it…pretty cool!)
If she admits that she hasn’t done much traveling, you can “push” her by acting like she’s not up her standards…and then “pull” her back to you.
“Oh my God, you mean to tell me the only time you’ve been outside of the United States was college spring break in Cancun? Well, you should just know, before we ever get married or have kids, you and me are going to spend some time in Buenos Aires. It’s my favorite city.”
This was also a playful example of the “instant relationship” technique—pretending that the two of you are already a couple, or destined to be a couple. You say it with a smile, as if you’re just kidding around, but it still has an effect on her subconscious. You’re making the idea of being in a relationship with each other seem like a natural, comfortable outcome.
Or, you can ask her one of the Hypothetical questions from the “Mack Tactics: Ultimate Edition” book, and then “push” her away when she gives the “wrong” answer. (With Hypotheticals, which are a favorite technique of mine, anything she says can be interpreted as a right or wrong answer.)
After she answers, you say “I can’t believe you gave that answer…I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to break up with you. Tell the girl over there in the red dress, she’s my new girlfriend.”
Then laugh, tell her you’re only kidding, and get into a discussion about the Hypothetical and the reasons behind her answer. Keep the push/pull in mind. Act like you’re never totally sure she’s cool enough to join your team, but you’re going to give her a chance to prove herself.
Now some final notes on dealing with really good-looking women. You never want to compliment a woman on how beautiful she is, since she’s probably heard this from 37 different lame-ass men in the past week. But you can bring up the subject of beauty, and use this to put her at ease about you and your intentions. (Very beautiful women will always suspect that a guy is only interested in their looks. When you act like her looks are unimportant to you, you present an interesting challenge.)
So let’s say you’re talking to a super-gorgeous woman (who is obviously well aware she is super-gorgeous):
WEAK MOVE: “I just have to tell you…you’re really beautiful.”
(Groan…)
STRONG MOVE: “I have this friend named Joanne. She’s a successful model. Extremely beautiful. And people think beautiful women have it easy, but I think it’s actually the opposite sometimes. People assume you’re cold and stuck up, and don’t have real feelings. Guys just want to sleep with you, and don’t care about getting to know the real you. I actually think Joanne’s life would be easier if she wasn’t quite so attractive.” (Now, let the girl riff on this topic, and bond with her over it.)
Then, do a “cold reading” on her to seem even more profound and insightful:
“I’m sure a lot of men perceive you as cold and stand-offish, but I can tell that you’re actually very sensitive. When someone makes a negative comment about you, you act like it doesn’t faze you, but then you think about it all night. People just don’t realize how sensitive you really are.”
The “cold reading” is a trick that psychics use. It’s the art of reading someone, without any prior knowledge of them, and seeming to understand what makes them tick. Used for seduction purposes, cold readings work especially well on women because they appeal to their sense of vanity. She’ll think that what you’re saying is unique only to her.
A good cold read makes you look incredibly insightful and profound…like you have “super powers,” in fact…even though you’re being totally vague. Here are some example of cold readings:
- “Jennifer, I get the sense that people perceive you as a really fun, outgoing, person…but actually, there are times when you want to be alone and tune out the world. You’ve got the sunny side you present to the world, but then you’ve also got a bit of a dark, complicated side, and sometimes you just need your private time.”
- “I get the feeling that you’ve got a creative talent, or an idea that you want to explore, and you really want to pursue it but something is holding you back.”
- “Sometimes you don’t want to take chances, and you wind up shooting yourself in the foot because you missed a good opportunity. But other times, you can be spontaneous and adventurous. And that’s when you’re most happy, because it’s the real you.”
- “The people you work with would say you’re a super confident person, and very good at your job. But you have insecurities that most people don’t know about. I mean, you’re only human, not this ‘super woman’ that people expect you to be.”
- “I can tell you’re an observer. Your crossed arms, your body language, the way you’re scanning the room…you like to watch people, and sometimes you worry too much about what other people think of you. But I bet you’re truly happy when you can just let go and be in the moment. I’m right, aren’t I?”
- “You have a strong need for others to like and admire you, but you also have a tendency to be critical of yourself.”
- “You’ve got a hidden talent, or a passion, that most people don’t know about, and you want to pursue it but something is holding you back.”
- “At times, you’re really social and outgoing. But other times, you’re reserved and introverted.”
