The most effective openers are ones that sneak under her radar and don’t sound like opening lines. (Remember, you don’t want to telegraph that you’re interested in her.)
Instead of opening with a question such as, “Hi, I’m Joe, what’s your name?” Or, “How are you doing tonight?”, try making a STATEMENT that includes some type of observation about her.
Example
“I can see you know how to have fun. Alright, you’re on the guest list for my next party.”
“Quick question. There’s this cool pair of jeans that I want to buy for a friend of mine. She’s around your size, but it’s hard to say, exactly. I’m just wondering, should I buy them a little bit bigger, or a little bit smaller? If the size is too big, I’m worried she might get a little bit offended…but if they’re too small, that might bum her out, y’know? Which would you prefer if someone bought you jeans that were a little bit too big, or a little too small?”
If this sounds like something trivial to ask a woman about, that’s sort of the point. What you start talking to her about is irrelevant, as long as it’s something original and compelling enough to make her reply.
The purpose of your opener, whether it’s a question, a statement, or a little story like the one above, is simply to be original and get her talking. Once she starts talking, you’ll find a way to interject and move the conversation onto a different topic. (You wouldn’t want to spend the next five minutes on a discussion about jeans, or how females have negative perceptions of their bodies, or whatever. The point of the story was to OPEN the conversation, nothing more.)
Next, you want to transition the conversation to a more interesting topic, one that also allows you to plant seeds about your positive qualities.
So, you use the “buying a pair of jeans opener,” and she says…
HER: I’d buy them a size too small, if anything. She can always return them if they don’t fit.
YOU: That’s true. I just know she’s been kind of self-conscious since her boyfriend broke up with her. I still can’t believe he dumped her over such a stupid reason…
HER: (curious now) Why? What happened?
YOU: Well, somehow he found out the password to her email account, and he checked her emails and found out that she’d been corresponding with her ex-boyfriend Mike. Mike was her high school sweetheart. They broke up years ago, and Mike has a wife and a kid now, but they stayed friends. Anyway, when her current boyfriend saw those emails, he flipped out and broke up with her.
HER: That’s terrible.
YOU: Some people just don’t get it. For me, I can’t be in a relationship unless I feel like I’m 100% trusted, and I can trust my girl completely. Trust and commitment are so important to me.
HER: Me too.
YOU: We have that in common, that’s good. So tell me…if you were dating a guy, and you found out the password to his email account, would you check it?
Now you’re engaged in a very compelling conversation. You’ve totally “reeled her in.” Once you feel enough has been said on this particular topic, transition to something else.
The point I’m making here is that talking about Relationship Dramas and Cheating are excellent topics for jump-starting a conversation with a woman. (Or women, plural you can start a conversation with a group of girls this way, just as easily.) Women naturally love gossip, especially about cheating and screwed-up relationships, which is why these openers and topics work SO effectively.
The skilled seducer, on the other hand, understands how to challenge women and frame himself as the “prize” that she needs to win. He talks very little about himself. When she asks him questions (such as “what do you do for a living?”), he responds with a playful joke, or alludes to what he does in vague terms.
He has no need to impress her. She is the one who is going to need to be impressive, because YOU are a man of wisdom and experience, with many options.
Project this to women, and they’ll express their interest in you. They’ll show it in small ways a brief touch, a flirtatious smile, a comment like “you’re cute” or “so are you this smooth with all the girls you meet?”
The key is to not take the bait. If she says or does something that seems to indicate her interest in you, ignore it. Stick with your game. Her indication of interest is not a license for you to drop your guard and broadcast your interest. If anything, you’ve got to play it more cool.
HER: “You’re so interesting. I feel like you and me really click.’”
YOU: “I hear that a lot from women.”
HER: “You’re probably a player, huh? Popular with the ladies?”
YOU: ‘Women like me, and I love women. So it all works out.”
HER: “I like you.”
YOU: “Yeah, I can tell.”
Let’s say that you’re out with a woman, and the conversation has been going great. You’ve been controlling the flow of the conversation and building a bond with her.
You say something funny and touch her on the knee.
She puts her hand on yours.
She looks into your eyes, and smiles…
So now the two of you are holding hands, and it’s obvious she’s attracted to you. At this point, the typical guy will think “this girl is into me,” and will start acting differently.
His inner Wuss will emerge. He’ll start being super-nice and polite and allow the conversation to drift onto the wrong topics. (Such as talking about “exes,” and past relationships, and his own personal problems…WEAK areas that should be avoided)
He’s trying extra hard not to “blow it.” He figures if he can just be super nice and polite and not say anything stupid, surely he’ll get her back to his place…
Because he’s received approval from her, and has proof that she likes him, he figures,
“I don’t need to keep applying my skills at this point. This one’s in the bag. I can just be myself now.”
The problem is, this means reverting back to being the boring, ordinary and predictable version of who he is. When she realizes that he’s really not the confident, funny, mysterious guy she thought he was, her attraction cools off…and the date ends with a kiss on the cheek, and her going home alone.
A classic example of this comes from the movie “The Empire Strikes Back.” Han Solo is about to descend into the carbon chamber and get deep-freezed. Princess Leia’s parting words to him are, “I love you.”
To which Han replies, “I know.”
So after all the sexual tension that has been building up between these two, she finally loses control and blurts out a declaration of love. And how does Han react? Does he reciprocate, by telling her how much he loves her and getting all mushy?
Hell no! He just says, “I know.”
Maybe he loves her, too. But he doesn’t give her the confession. He doesn’t give her the validation she is craving at that moment. He doesn’t let her win.
As a result, this AMPLIFIES the sexual tension, and Leia’s attraction towards him, to a mind-blowing level. If she wanted him before, now she absolutely craves him with every molecule of her being.
If you start chatting with a woman in a bar, don’t monopolize her time and space. Excuse yourself to step outside and make a phone call, or to check in with some friends. Come back five or ten minutes later and pick up where you left off with her.
The idea is to get her interested, build up her attraction, then disengage and give her space. Repeat the process. You can make her miss you, even if you’re only stepping away for a few minutes. This is also a sure sign of confidence. Imagine how the average guy would handle the situation: he’d stand there and talk her ear off for as long as she allowed him to. Not you.
Nice guys say predictable things, and take women out on predictable dates. You want to have an “edge” that conveys calm, cool confidence; act like your options are endless, and she’s just one of them.
If you’re standing at the bar, talking to a girl, here’s what the difference would be…
BORING GUY: “So, can I buy you a drink?”
COOL GUY: “Grab us a couple of drinks, I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
Or, another variation on this:
BORING GUY: “Let me buy you a drink.”
COOL GUY: “Y’know what, Melissa, I get the sense that you’re a lot deeper than most guys realize. I’m going to go ahead and get us some drinks, because I want to hear more about that trip you took toSpain.” Or, as you’re about to leave the bar with her…
BORING GUY: “Can I walk you to your car?”
COOL GUY: “C’mon, walk me to my car.”
Or, when you call her to schedule a date:
BORING GUY: “Maybe if you’re free sometime, we could get together and do something…”
COOL GUY: “I’m planning on checking out this new Mexican place on Friday night, I hear they make the best margaritas in town. Why don’t you come along, I can pick you up at eight o’clock.”
Assume that the last 37 guys that approached her, or called her, were utterly predictable. They introduced themselves the same way, asked her the same series of “job interview”-type questions, and talked about standard, uninteresting topics. And they only changed topics when the current topic had been run into the ground.
The key to having dynamic conversations is that you control the flow. You keep the conversation moving into new, interesting territory. Don’t linger on a topic until it has run out of steam. Keep the conversation flowing in new directions to keep her in a heightened, interested emotional state.
Guys in their 40 and 50s tend to have a harder time conceptualizing that they can be successful with younger women online. Age and experience, however, can be huge assets that you use to your advantage.
For starters, stop viewing your age as a vulnerability, and don’t bother trying to hide (or fudge) the truth. Assuming you are truthful in your profile, your age is going to be listed right there for women to see.
Sure, a lot of guys will shave a few years off their actual age, but eventually you’ve got to meet these women in person and if you’re obviously way older than you claimed to be, she is going to automatically deem you untrustworthy.)
I’ve helped many guys to become more successful with dating younger women. Personally, I don’t date women over the age of 25, and with these methods I’ve managed to get up to 10 dates a week with beautiful women on a recurring basis.
I’ve also had the chance to experience firsthand some of the most common obstacles that older men face when using online dating. I’ve been fortunate to get really good at overcoming these obstacles, and other guys have asked me how to overcome these challenges.
This is why I’ve put this special report together: to help guys like us get over these obstacles easily, and find success in online dating—no matter what you want to get out of it.
Obstacle #1:
You mention your age in an email, and she doesn’t respond.
I hate to say this, but age is an issue for some girls. This is probably one of the most common issues older guys face when trying online dating, since you’ve got to try to communicate your personality through your profile, and cleverly written emails.
If you’d met this same girl while you were out shopping on a Sunday afternoon, she might be immediately interested in your personality, your style, etc. But when you’re attempting to meet women online, she has a lot less information to go on—and more reasons to hit the “delete” button, simply because she has preconceived notions about the age range she thinks she is interested in.
Still, there are right ways, and wrong ways, to handle this. I’ve seen cases in which guys apologized for being older, as if mentioning their age as a reason for women to reject them. Bad, bad move.
Women (both offline and online) are interpretive creatures. Everything you say gets filtered through her mental computer, and if you make something into an issue, it will become an issue for her as well.
Why bring up anything that will give her a reason to doubt or reject you? She can see your profile, and if she doesn’t like it, she won’t respond (and there are ways to overcome that, too)…but if she does like what you have to say, you’ll be in the door, even if you’re 20 or 30 years older than her.
Obstacle #2:
You email a girl and she doesn’t respond to your email.
This is one of the most common issues guys face when they first get started with online dating, and it causes some men to throw in the towel far too prematurely. There are several reasons why this could happen:
1. The girl is simply unavailable: she met someone and forgot to remove her profile from the dating site. You can easily overcome this by using a search filtered by “last date active.” Girls who haven’t been active for a while (usually over a week) are most likely less available then girls who are still active every day.
2. The girl is not in town/too busy/abducted by aliens/etc. Sometimes it’s just a matter of timing. She might not have enough time to reply, or she isn’t around to answer your email. In this case, don’t be a baby and start harassing her with emails asking why she didn’t answer your email, and why she’s ignoring you. Just wait for a while, and if you see that she’s been active lately on the site, email her one more time.
3. The girl didn’t see your email: attractive women usually get bombarded with emails when they sign up for an online dating service. They may get overwhelmed, and don’t take the time to sort through all the emails they get.
Who can blame them? What you can do is, stand out with your emails by using a catchy subject line. For example, using the “matrix approach” I talk about in my ebook “Internet Dating Secrets Revealed!”, scan through her profile and target something that she says is important to her.
Then, when you write to her, put a “challenge” in the subject line. If she says she likes Mexican food, you write “I can’t believe you like Mexican food…”
She’ll notice the subject of your email because it will stand out from all the “I want to meet you” or “hello beautiful” emails she gets. She’ll glance at the subject line and think, “what’s wrong with me liking Mexican food? Why is this guy challenging me?”
Attractive women are used to men supplicating to them and saying stuff like “you like Mexican food? I like it too!” just to try to get her to like them. By challenging her, you are separating yourself from the pack. She will then read the email to see what you have to say. You don’t need to mention Mexican food ever again. Just use that tactic to pique her curiosity and get the correspondence started.
Obstacle #3:
You want to get good at online dating, but you don’t feel ready yet to email the REALLY attractive young women.
This is another common scenario. You figure there is a “learning curve” with online dating, so you’re better off trying to correspond with the more “regular” girls before you try for the gold.
It’s true that online dating excellence is a skill. This is especially true if you are trying to date women who are much younger than you, and have a lot of options. Depending on your level of “game,” you might need some practice and trial and error in order to develop a level of skill that will allow you to meet younger women of exceptional quality. And there’s nothing wrong with taking this attitude.
Once you spend enough time on a dating site, you will start seeing the same faces over and over again. You’ll start to notice the “regulars” but perhaps you don’t want to burn out your options too soon (especially in smaller towns), when you don’t feel you have the skills down yet. In this case, a great method to use, that allows you to build stock material and get some practice, is “moving.”
No, I don’t mean that you need to physically move to a new town. With a quick adjustment to your profile and a click of a mouse, you can change your location and then you have a totally new set of girls you can practice on. (Hey, who knows, you might even wind up traveling to meet a girl in another city if something interesting develops.)
I don’t recommend “moving” your location to major “player” cities likeLos AngelesorNew York. I suggest trying this tactic in smaller, less “sophisticated” cities and practice there. If you do want an advanced class in online pick up, then Los AngelesandNew Yorkare hotbeds for attractive younger women but expect a lot of competition. Click here for more tips and tactics.
Women love paradoxical guys. Women crave men who are complicated and mysterious, not simple and easy to figure out. To start, answer these questions: What is it that women would not expect about you? How are you paradoxical?
Every man reading this is paradoxical at some level. You have the ability to portray many different aspects of your personality at one time. You do this by sharing and revealing different points of view that you hold, sharing unique stories, and showing that you, in your own way, are paradoxical.
Show a woman that:
You are a gentleman and a “bad” boy at the same time.
You are sexual and trustworthy at the same time.
You’re ambitious and focused, but also know how to cut loose and party.
You can be hot and cold: giving her your undivided attention, then being unavailable when she wants to see you or talk to you on the phone.
You can be both edgy and sweet.
You can be emotionally available and emotionally turbulent at the same time.
You can be dramatic and serious, and also silly and playful.
You’re a funny guy who doesn’t take life too seriously, but you can also talk about deep, introspective topics.
You can accomplish this through telling stories and sharing details of your life that highlight different aspects of your personality—especially things about yourself that a woman will not expect.
Be Emotional
We all know that women love, and bond through, emotions. Emotions are like your “artist’s palette” when you’re constructing conversations with women. It is emotional intensity that changes the tone and vibe of a conversation, and by subtly tweaking the emotional content, you can change the mood dramatically.
Learning to speak the language of women means using emotions in your stories, and in your conversations. You need to learn how to include EMOTIONAL CONTENT when asking questions and making statements.
Come up with stories from your life on the following topics:
A time you felt frustrated or angry.
A time you were really scared.
A funny but embarrassing story.
A story about a time you felt overwhelmed with excitement or joy.
You need to start utilizing emotional content to create a deeper sense of rapport with women. When you do so, they will feel more connected to you. When you don’t, women will feel that the conversation is more platonic and boring. Click here for more tips.
I can’t help liking this guy. He’s ambitious and is always juggling a few different projects. He’s always learning new things and works out almost every day. He might sing karaoke, study martial arts, attend motivational seminars, volunteer for good causes, learn different languages, and train his dog to do tricks.
In his free time, he might create 3-D animations, or build a boat. Have I forgotten anything? Oh, yes. He also likes to think of himself as a “pickup artist.”
This guy appears to have an interesting, rich life. The challenge lies in his inherent superficiality. The reason, strangely enough, is the same as with the previous archetype: fear of reality.
The difference is that while the Brainwashed guy is hindered by what society and the media tell him is the “best,” the Scattered Self-Improver is constantly trying to distract himself.
He goes out on a lot of first dates. He rarely gets a second date: he seems to lose interest in that woman, or he can’t find time to see her again, or (more often than not) she finds his lifestyle overwhelming and feels intimidated by his well-rounded greatness.
Even when he gets to have a relationship with a woman, it hardly lasts longer than a few weeks.
A solution? Tone it down. Less is more. We cannot be all things at once. Sacrifice the numbers for the sake of depth. Make choices.
Over the last few years, I’ve worked with hundreds of men on improving and in many cases, radically transforming their romantic lives. At least a half of these men were born in the 1960s or earlier.
I measure the success of what I do by what my students consider their personal breakthroughs. I’m proud to say that my success rate, when it comes to helping men achieve a greater level of success with women, is over 90 percent.
I never expect to have absolute success in all cases: I know how life works and do not suffer from obsessive perfectionism. I’m pleased with the somewhat imperfect consistency of the results of my teaching.
So before I wrap up this chapter, let me share with you a few successful case studies (since I get to choose whom I tell you about, I guess I will just brag about the most interesting ones). The names of the characters in these stories, and certain personal details, are changed for the sake of their privacy.
Gene, a resident ofLondonand a professional magazine editor, recently came to visit me inNew York. He was a 57-year-old widower and a father of three adult children.
We spent five days together a period of intensive training, during which I got Gene to observe me in action as I approached dozens of women in bookstores, museums, shopping centers, coffee houses, parks, and in the streets. After that, it was Gene’s turn to show me what he can do.
Most of the women Gene met during those days were considerably younger than he was. Gene was painfully shy during the first couple of days, and we shared a few dramatic moments when our teacher/student relationship was tested by fire and ice. Eventually, he managed to open up, and after the third day of training on things began to go much better for him. In the beginning, he learned to approach women and open conversations with the simplest “excuse me.”
By the end of his training with me he could consistently get phone numbers, using the elegant, hard-to refuse tactic: “I’d like you to have my phone number… and I want yours, of course”. Gene sent a gentlemanly text message “I’m glad I met you” to each of the women whose numbers he got, invited the ones who responded to meet him later on the same day, went out with one of the youngest of those women, ended up making out in her place, and was an hour late for our final night training session in a bar.
Today, several months after Gene and I met, he is dating a woman in her thirties a journalist like himself. From what I understand, Gene is not planning to marry her, and yet he speaks of her as a hopefully permanent romantic partner.
Another example would be Robert, 46 years old and African American, who lives inChicagoand works in the medical field. The challenge he faced was of a different sort: he was dating a very attractive woman in her early twenties, and yet he suffered from a nagging sense that he didn’t deserve to be with someone like her.
My work with Robert began to feel closer to that of a therapist than a courtship instructor but I don’t really do therapy, so instead I chose to address my new friend’s self-doubts by “reconnecting” him with womankind through field practice.
Robert and I spent a couple of days chatting with every attractive young woman we could find inChicago, in every place we could think of: bookstores, shopping malls, coffee houses, a bus terminal, even inside a Catholic temple.
I enjoyed seeing young women attracted to Robert wherever we went, and noticed how he began to blossom in the awareness of his masculine charm.
Robert had no approach anxiety and was a naturally great communicator. In the Art Institute of Chicago he approached an attractive young blonde, started a conversation about a surrealist painting she was observing, and ended up cruising the museum with her, his arm around her waist. To match him, I found a girl for myself.
Each time Robert and I passed each other with our beautiful companions, we exchanged conspiratorial nods or winks… until the girls figured us out and started laughing.
Then we made the introduction. The four of us had dinner together, and agreed to meet again later. After that, Robert and I discussed the events of the last two days, sharing a six-pack of Guinness in my hotel room. Robert told me that he began to see women’s ready interest in him as something to be expected.
My job was pretty much done. We ended up celebrating on a Saturday night in a bar on top of Water Tower. The girls from the Art Institute were there with us.
My final example is Andrew, 41, a software engineer of Japanese descent fromToronto. He’s one of my favorite students, because he had a number of significant challenges to overcome yet he was determined to keep working on himself until he had achieved a new lifestyle, image, pattern of behaviors, and a new self-perception.
It took a while. When Andrew and I first met, he was overweight, slouching, and dreadfully dressed with non-existent conversational skills, a high-pitched voice, a gloomy disposition, and a terribly negative belief that “Asian men don’t get many chicks.” He had a great talent for triggering instant resistance in every woman he tried to approach.
By this point, he was pretty desperate. He hated his job, his apartment, and his body. It was obvious to me that the guy was not ready to get to the actual dating he had to take certain measures first, to prepare himself.
Before I began actually teaching him, I sent him back home with a few bits of advice: to throw away the coat that gave his shoulders sloping rounded shape, and to get instead a classic jacket that would underline the angular look a man’s shoulders must have; to get rid of the pleated corporate khaki pants he was wearing, and spend a couple hundred dollars on decent jeans. For the full measure, I threw in the mandate to get in shape and stand up straight.
When Andrew came back three months later, he was twenty pounds lighter (a result of a karate class he signed up for), and stood two inches taller thanks to his improved posture. He was dressed more stylishly, as well. Yes, these were definite improvements. We spent a day working on the way he moved. We didn’t approach a single woman that day; that part of the process would come later.
After he returned to Toronto, we started our weekly Yahoo Messenger sessions and over the next four months I taught him conversational skills. We started with the basics that Andrew confessed made him feel back in the elementary school again: we had to do it, because in Andrew’s speech even simple concise statements and elementary questions needed to be cleaned up.
We progressed through complex statements to my favorite simple and fun-to-learn verbal improvisation skills like 4-corner flirting, compliments and teasing, dynamic statement of intent, topical and emotional pivoting, free association, and eliciting erotic fantasies, and a few others.
Over time, Andrew developed the necessary “conversational comfort zone” he needed to feel confident enough to approach women. He came back toNew Yorkagain, and that’s when we finally began to test his skills in the field. I am very happy to say that Andrew has turned out to become an even greater ladies man than yours truly.
He found a much better job, and he’s taking voice lessons. When I met him again a few weeks ago, he radiated confidence and charm. He ended up getting back together with his ex-girlfriend, and the two of them are much tighter than before. Click here for Part 1.
Look, if you’d prefer to be dating hot younger women — and you DON’T want to date cynical single mothers, jaded feminists, or girls who come with a lot of baggage — the principal thing to keep in mind is that younger babes actually like to be with older men.
(By the way, you can learn exactly how to become the older dude that younger women WANT by going to our How To Date Younger Women site.)
It’s true that you can absolutely succeed with dating younger women. I’m stating a simple fact.Over the past 200-plus years, the United States government has been taking note of statistics for the ages of men and women getting married. Each year, there is a larger gap between the ages of women and men who marry each other.
Basically, the average age difference between guys and their wives continues to get bigger.
Here’s another interesting statistic: men who marry for a second time are on average doing it with women who are around 10 years younger.
Here’s another thing to consider: in twenty percent of these second marriages, the guy is over 20 years younger than his spouse.
A woman who is 20 years younger?? Oh no! The “Femi-Nazis” get infuriated when they hear this! They’ll say it’s weird! Aberrant!
Ironically, no one seems to disapprove if the man is wealthy and famous. Then he is virtually expected to marry a significantly younger wife.
I mean, no one objected when Donald Trump re-married and got married to some gorgeous young model. A number of years later, they still seem very delighted with each other.
How To Get A Date With Younger Women
What about the actor Michael Douglas? (He’s married to Catherine Zeta-Jones, the insanely hot actress. ‘Nuff said.)
I could give you a ton of other examples. This has been the deal all throughout history. It’s only in modern times that a double-standard has emerged — that it’s all right for a successful older guy to be with younger women, but it’s somehow “wrong” for the normal guy to pursue this option.
Why are older men compelled to be with younger women? It goes a lot deeper than just wanting a hot young babe. It’s because this is what men are biologically PROGRAMMED to want: a youthful, beautiful, fertile stunner who will bear him healthy children.
Also, it’s not only about sex and procreation. According to research, it’s been demonstrated that a younger woman can quite literally extend a man’s life span. Her youth is literally contagious and will keep her husband active (and not just in the bedroom!)
When you come right down to it, the longing to date younger women is a normal, healthy impulse.
To start being with younger women there is a flirting move you need to start utilizing. It is a technique that I use all the time, and I’ve seduced lovely younger women right out from under their bad-boy 23 year old lovers! Just promise me you won’t share this secret with too many guys. This tactic, and many others, are found in our free seduction guide which you can download now at the www.youngerdating.com website.
Look, if you’d rather be dating and hooking up with beautiful younger girls — and you DON’T want to date embittered single mothers, jaded feminists, or women who come with a lot of baggage — the imperative thing to keep in mind is that younger babes actually like to be with older guys.
(Actually, you can learn precisely how to become the older guy that younger women desire by going to our How To Date Younger Women site.)
The reality is that you can indeed definitely date hot younger women. This is a fact.Over 200 years ago, the US government started recording statistics for the ages of couples that were getting married. You may be surprised to know that each year, the age gap between men and women who get married grows larger.
Essentially, the average age difference between guys and their wives continues to expand.
Actually, when guys get married for the SECOND time, they marry women who are 10 years younger, on average.
Another interesting fact is that 20% of guys who marry for a second time are getting married to a woman that is over over two decades younger.
A wife who is twenty years younger?? The horror! The “Femi-Nazis” get furious when they hear this! They will declare that it’s not right! Aberrant!
The irony is, no one seems to take offense if the guy is wealthy and famous. Then he is practically expected to wed a significantly younger wife.
I mean, no one batted an eye when Donald Trump re-married and got hitched to some dazzling young model. A number of years later, they still seem exceptionally delighted with each other.
Older Guys Dating Younger Women
Another example is the actor Michael Douglas. He is still married to the striking (and much younger) Catherine Zeta-Jones — and seriously, if these marriages were purely about money and celebrity, they would soon fall apart. But in a lot of cases, they do.
I could give you a ton of other examples. This has been the deal all throughout history. It’s only in modern times that a double-standard has emerged — that it’s okay for a powerful and highly respected older man to be with a much younger spouse, but it’s for some reason wrong or inappropriate for the average dude to pursue this option.
So why, exactly, do older guys have such a prevailing desire to be with a younger wife? Well it actually goes much deeper than him simply wanting a young babe with a firm body. It’s because this is what men are biologically hard-wired to want: a youthful, hot, fertile babe who will bear him healthy children.
Furthermore, it’s not only about sex and procreation. According to studies, it’s been shown that a younger woman can quite literally prolong a man’s life span. Her youth is literally contagious and will keep her husband active (and not just in the bedroom!)
All in all, the longing to date younger women is a natural, healthy desire.
To start attracting younger women there is a technique you need to start using. This secret tactic is based on female psychology and its effects are DEVASTATING. Do not tell women about this flirting move because they will say it’s devious and scheming – but there is no question that it works! This secret of being with younger women is included in our FREE seduction manual which you can grab right now. at the Dating Younger Women website.
It’s best to tell the truth, but in my opinion, you don’t have to tell her your age straight away.
Women may want all the information on you immediately, but you don’t have a responsibility to tell her everything upfront and in the first few minutes, or even hours. Use intrigue, and reveal things about yourself over time. If every time she hangs out with you, you reveal some new talent or hobby of yours, she’ll be endlessly curious and interested in knowing more about you. This is much more effective than reeling off your list of accomplishments and interests in the first thirty minutes you spend talking to her.
Women will often use standard job interview-type questions when they first meet a man—such as your age, your job, where you live, etc. It’s better to bypass this “Q&A” and engage women on a fun, more creative level. Stimulate that side of her, and don’t cater to her analytical and probing side—where she’s asking the questions, you’re trying to come up with the “right” answers, and she’s running it all through her mental computer and figuring out whether you’re the type of guy she should be interested in.
What do you do with her friends?
One problem you may face when dating younger women is that she may be less likely to introduce you to her friends and family. Some guys can get offended by this, and see this as a sign that the woman is putting limits on how serious she considers the relationship to be. The best approach is to focus on shaping and living in the “now” and enjoying the time you spend with her.
Older guys sometimes fall into the trap of thinking ahead too much, and getting too serious with any young woman that show them attention. It may take a while for a woman to picture herself in a long-term relationship with you, and if you try and force it too early, it can backfire. (When you put pressure on her to make a commitment, it always conveys a sense of urgency and desperation on your part—very unattractive qualities.) Many times, I’ve seen younger women think that a long-term relationship with an older guy just isn’t in the cards. But the more time they spend with the guy, the more their feelings change.
What about online dating?
I think that when you’re dealing with an age gap, meeting women face-to-face is especially important because you can have a chance to have fun with her before she screens you based on age. But online dating is a good way to increase your exposure to women, and it can be a key part of a lifestyle that involves constantly interacting with new people. I recommend you incorporate online dating into your lifestyle.
You’re likely to get “hung up” on one particular woman, and put all your eggs in that basket, when she’s the only option on your radar. If you’re meeting women on your social scene, and regularly emailing and chatting with new women online, you’ll never feel that you NEED to make it happen with a certain girl. You’ve got a Plan B, a Plan C, and so on.
What are some more specifics on approaching and dating younger women?
One of the best naturals I ever met was 40 years old. He was the guy who would pick up a girl EVERY time we would go out, and often within minutes. He would roll into a club and he’d be kissing women before I got my first drink. Sometimes these were hot college girls, and he had bad teeth and was small, short and pretty skinny. But my God, he was dominant! He was cocky, bordering on arrogant. He could be pushy. He’d touch women long before most guys would think it was appropriate to do so. But it worked!
On the other hand, most older guys are limited by terrible imaginary rules about pickup and dating—like making physical contact with a woman you just met is wrong, or you shouldn’t approach groups of younger women because they’ll only shut you out. Believe me, the list is endless for what I call “creative avoidance”—the silly justifications that men come up with, for not going after what they want.
Follow the standard rules of pickup. According to my method, these rules include:
Approach first, think later
Start touching straight away (not in a creepy way—find creative, subtle ways to establish body contact. This can be as simple as high-fiving her after you agree on something funny.)
Look to move her to a different location pretty quickly (this could be another area of the bar)
Escalate: physically, logistically, and by going for the “pull” or the phone number. (But save the heavy physical escalation for when you’re one-on-one with her.)
Never be the typical “nice guy”; don’t act needy or timid
Enjoy women. Don’t treat them as objects, have fun with them.
I want to reinforce the idea that pickup is easy.
Younger women are not that hard to meet and date. In fact, that young hottie you’ve got your eye on is eager to meet an older guy who brings value to their life, makes her feel safe and protected, and takes her mind off the stresses and problems of her reality. Why shouldn’t that guy be you?
This blog contains the new and updated Secrets Of Dating Younger Women.” When I first released this program two years ago, the response was overwhelming. Since then, guys around the world have enjoyed this program and written me to share their success stories.
Anyway, the other night I met up for drinks with a friend of mine named Jack. Jack is in his mid-forties and recently suffered through a brutal divorce. Jack has cautiously begun to dip his toe back into the dating pool, but he’s a bit nervous about the whole thing not to mention being severely out of practice.
Jack began to complain to me about his lack of success. He’d been using an Internet dating service and had found it fairly easy to line up dates with several women. But so far, the results had been awful.
The women Jack were meeting up with were close to his own age, in some cases 4-6 years younger. But while he still possessed the energy and enthusiasm of a younger man, these ladies seemed so…well, old!
A typical date would involve Jack shelling out a bunch of money to take the woman out for a nice meal, while she spent most of the time complaining about her ex-husband, problems with her kids, her bills, and other assorted crap he really didn’t want to hear about.
So I asked Jack, “If you could describe the perfect woman for you to date your dream girlfriend what would she be like?” Jack shrugged and reeled off some of the usual “criteria”: she’d be pretty, in good shape, intelligent, great sense of humor, etc…
Then I asked him, “and how old would this woman be? Would she be 45 years old, the same as you?” To this, Jack chuckled and sighed. “Well, I guess if I had my choice, of course she’d be younger. But what would a hot young babe want with a guy like me?”
Jack clearly needed some coaching and some positive reinforcement. He takes care of himself and stays in shape. He looks younger than his actual age. He’s also a very smart, interesting guy who’s done a lot of traveling and has a wealth of experiences to share and talk about.
So why can’t a guy like Jack enjoy himself with sexy younger women? And furthermore, why would a younger woman not want to date a guy like Jack? I’ll tell you why. It’s because we’ve been conditioned to believe that dating a hot and significantly younger woman is somehow “weird.”
Of course, it’s perfectly fine in fact, it’s expected if you’re a rich guy, or a famous guy. Then it’s okay, right? But regular guys like Jack aren’t supposed to consider this option. They think it just wouldn’t be “appropriate” or “acceptable,” and on top of that, they’ve been brainwashed to believe that sexy younger women would never want to date them, anyway!
Dealing With Younger Women
Well, here’s the big dirty “secret” that THEY don’t want you to know about… And when I say “they,” I’m referring to two groups of people:
Group #1: The women in your age group. They’re usually either stuck in miserable marriages, or finding it impossible to land a “good man” (i.e. one who will pay their bills and put up with their endless baggage and bullshit). These bitter women certainly don’t want the eligible bachelors in their already-shallow dating pool to have younger women as options!
Group #2: Your male friends. I’m going to assume that you don’t have many single guy friends at this point in your life. Most of them (if not all) are married or in serious relationships, and handed over their testicles long ago. As much as they gripe about the confines of their relationship, they believe this is how it’s “supposed to be” once a man reaches a certain age.
The fun has to end sometime, right? Sooner or later a man has to settle down and get serious… This is what society, the media, and your friends and family would try to make you believe. And if you’re over the age of 35, the other part of this belief is that you should get “serious” with a woman your age, or very close to it.
But this doesn’t mean it’s what men really want. Actually, it runs counter to the way we are hard-wired. To put it bluntly, your buddies would be absolutely mad with jealousy if they knew you were tagging some hot young piece of ass! And here’s the big secret they wish they’d learned before:
Men are Hard-Wired
Men are biologically hard-wired to want to be with younger women; it is a healthy, natural desire. And women are programmed to desire older men. It’s been this way for thousands of years!
So what if you are interested in seriously pursuing Option B: dating women who are significantly younger than you are? Well, the benefits of dipping into this dating pool are obvious. You know that women your age typically show up to a relationship with more baggage than Paris Hilton returning home from an all-day shopping spree.
The average single woman past the age of 35 is divorced (at least once), probably has at least one child, and has formed a lot of lousy, negative beliefs and unrealistic expectations about men and relationships.
There’s just too much crap you’ll need to deal with. And why should you? Then, of course, there is the physical appeal of younger women. Smooth skin; shiny, lustrous hair; a firm body that hasn’t begun to sag in all the wrong places; a turbo-charged libido and a willingness to experiment in the bedroom; and perhaps most importantly of all, a sense of exuberance and spontaneity that makes you feel young again. Eager to jump start your dating experience with young women? click here for more tips.
The other day, a pal of mine asked me what I thought about older men dating younger women, and if I had any distinctive “pickup lines” for meeting younger women.
For starters, older men dating younger women is totally normal. And yet, a lot of men don’t think they’ve got what it takes to meet and date a really attractive younger woman.
The reality is, not only is it possible for you to date younger women — it’s actually easier than you think. The first and most important thing to keep in mind is that women actually prefer older guys.
You can certainly succeed with dating younger women. I don’t care what the women your age tell you; it’s a fact.Over 200 years ago, the US government started recording statistics for the ages of couples that were getting married. Each year, there is a more significant gap between the ages of men and women who marry each other.
Every year, the guys get a bit older on average, and their spouses get a bit younger.
In fact, when men get married for the SECOND time, they marry women who are 10 years younger, on average.
I’ve also read that 20% of men who marry for a second time are getting married to a woman that is over 20 YEARS YOUNGER.
{A woman who is twenty years younger?? Oh no! The “Femi-Nazis” get angry when they hear this! They will declare that it’s not right! Going against nature!
The irony is, no one seems to disapprove if the guy is wealthy and famous. Then he is basically expected to marry a significantly younger woman.
I mean, no one batted an eye when Donald Trump re-married and got married to some dazzling young model. Years later, they still seem exceptionally delighted with each other.
How To Get Hot Younger Girlfriend
What about the actor Michael Douglas? (For quite a while now he’s been married to Catherine Zeta-Jones, the stunning actress. ‘Nuff said.)
I could give you a ton of other examples. This has been true all throughout history. It’s only in modern times that a double-standard has emerged — that it’s okay for a successful older guy to be with a much younger spouse, but it’s somehow “wrong” for the normal dude to pursue this route.
So why, exactly, do older men have such a powerful desire to be with a younger spouse? It goes a lot deeper than just wanting a hot young babe. The deeper reasons are rooted in our biology; men are hard-wired to want a woman who is in good physical shape, young and fertile, who has the greatest chance of bearing his children and carrying on his genetic legacy.
And it’s not just about sex and having kids. Studies have shown that being in a relationship with a younger woman increases the life span of the guy. Her youthful enthusiasm and energy LITERALLY rubs off on you, and makes you feel, and act, younger.
In essence, the yearning to desire to be dating younger women is a normal, healthy desire.
If you’d like to make yourself powerfully fascinating to younger women, I have a trick that I want to show you. This secret flirting move is based on female psychology and its effects are very powerful. www.youngerdating.com
So now the two of you are holding hands, and it’s obvious she’s attracted to you. At this point, the typical guy will think “this girl is into me,” and will start acting differently.
What about the actor Michael Douglas? (He’s married to Catherine Zeta-Jones, the insanely hot actress. ‘Nuff said.)
Another example is the actor Michael Douglas. He is still married to the striking (and much younger) Catherine Zeta-Jones — and seriously, if these marriages were purely about money and celebrity, they would soon fall apart. But in a lot of cases, they do.
What about the actor Michael Douglas? (For quite a while now he’s been married to Catherine Zeta-Jones, the stunning actress. ‘Nuff said.)